'Designated Survivor' Serves Up 'Barking Mad' Christians for Christmas

"There's no legal prohibition for standing in the path of a fire, sir."

On ABC’s Designated Survivor, Christmas takes a turn for the not-so-Christmas-y. The December 13th installment of the show about President Kiefer Sutherland's trials and tribulations puts Christian extremists front and center, as they hold to inexplicable beliefs that will likely cause a baby’s death.

The writers for the show have concocted a strange sect called The Church of the Witnesses of the Covenant, which, in contrast to anything resembling mainstream Christianity, doesn’t believe in blood transfusions. For added Left Coast, blue-state condescension — and trite writing — the group’s leader has been given a thick Southern drawl, which he uses to dramatic effect as he leads his flock…in the woods. Apparently, this is Hollywood’s idea of what Christians are like.

As a wildfire blazes, the religious radicals refuse to leave their cabin in protest of the federal government’s impending, life-saving treatment of member Carrie Morgan’s 6-month-old daughter. The baby, who is currently in federal custody at Walter Reed Hospital, is soon to receive a transfusion. For some bizarre reason -- let's call it bigotry -- Designated Survivor’s writers think this is something Christians would find unacceptable.

The cult delivers a message to the President of the United States: if the government returns the baby to Carrie’s custody — sans transfusion — they will leave the cabin and find safety from the fire. Otherwise, the President realizes, a baby’s life will be saved, but a religious group will burn to death in protest of his actions. Tensions are high, as the President contemplates the right move:

 Lyor: Mr. President, it's gonna be hard to control the narrative on this one if it drags on. 

Seth: Try impossible. You step in, religious activists are gonna slam you for interfering with the rights of the mother. 

Lyor: And children's rights activists will declare you public enemy number one if you let the baby die. 

President: Kendra, do we have any legal options that'll help us deal with these people? 

Kendra: No, there's no legal prohibition for standing in the path of a fire, sir.

Lyor: Well, unless you're barking mad, which these people clearly are. 

Kendra: Clearly? No. But we can challenge their competency. If they are a danger to themselves, we can forcibly remove them. Which would clear the way to operate on baby Grace and solve our problem.

In the end, the federal government does what all good Leftists know it was created to do: protect Americans from Christian religious extremism. And we’re all reminded this Christmas that Christians are irrational wackos and would-be baby-killers.

Thank you, ABC and parent company Disney, for a Christmas episode that was almost Christian Nuts Roasting on an Open Fire.

We eagerly await the show's episode which will cast Islam in the same repellant light in which they cast Christianity.