Like A Boss: Chinese Tycoon Wants to Buy NYT, Hands Out Epic Business Card

"I'm very good at working with Jews."

Chinese billionaire Chen Guangbiao may not have the world's loftiest goal - to buy the New York Times - but he probably has the greatest business card of all time.

According to The Independent, Guangbiao wants to purchase the New York Times in order to "reform its award-winning coverage of China." 

Writing in a Chinese newspaper linked to the Communist Party, he insisted: 'I may be a maverick, but it doesn't mean I like playing tricks. I want to purchase the New York Times. Please do not treat it as a joke.'

Before divulging what his business card says about him, here is what Guangbiao told the South China Morning Post about working with Jewish-owned American newspapers:

I'm very good at working with Jews.

What else could one say about such an honorable fellow? Let him tell you in his own words, from the front of his business card:

Most Influential Person of China
Most Prominent Philanthropist of China
China Moral Leader
China Earthquake Rescue Hero
Most Well-known and Beloved Chinese Role Model
China Top Ten Most Honorable Volunteer
Most Charismatic Philanthropist of China
China Low Carbon Emission
Environmental Protection Top Advocate
China's Foremost Environmental Preservation Demolition Expert

No one is sure why "Very Good at Working with Jews" did not make the card, but with all the other qualities on the list, there may have been no room.