Andrew Klavan: The Newest Threat on College Campuses: Microaggression

In which our brave and compassionate host takes a look at some real-life examples of microaggression and the deep harm such assaults can really do. 

TRANSCRIPT: 

OUR MICRO-AGGRESSIVE UNIVERSITIES

I’m Andrew Klavan and this is the Revolting Truth.

Well, it’s back to school time and all across our country, college students are suffering from an insidious form of oppression called microaggressions.  These are defined as commonplace verbal or, behavioral indignities...  that communicate racist or sexist slights or insults...” 

Microaggressions take place when, for instance, a woman sees a black male and clutches her purse more tightly making it too damn hard for him to snatch the thing away from her... or when two men hear a woman speaking and look at one another like this [makes a face] the universal sign language for “irrational woman.”  So don’t let them see you do that because you know women.  [makes the face]

To combat the tragedy of microagression, we here at the Revolting Truth have collected some real life MA experiences and submitted them to experts for commentary and advice. Trigger warning:  these are genuine examples of microaggression and may cause you to experience some of the terrifying injustice of being a minority or female college student in today’s America. 

All right, here’s one from the website, The MicroAgressions Project:  [quote] “I wanted to get my nephew a My Little Pony coloring book since I like MLP...  My brother, however, objected...  I ended up getting my nephew a Batman one, but I don’t like Batman.  It made me feel angry and sad that my brother is so entrenched in stereotypical gender roles.”

Wow.  We submitted this sad story to Aran, an Iraqi Yazidi women, who sent this reply:

“Dear American College student.  I am very sorry to hear of your My Little Pony incident.  I perhaps can identify with some of your suffering as I was forced to watch while Islamists murdered my beloved husband and children before selling me into sexual slavery.  Like you, I too felt forced into stereotypical gender roles.  I hope your nephew enjoys his Batman.”

Here’s another tragic tale of micro-aggressive woe from a powerful performance piece called I Too Am Harvard:  [quote] “I am a Harvard university student of mixed race, and people sometimes come right up to me and ask, ‘What are you?’”

We sent this description to our friend Lisa in the Central African Republic.  Lisa gave this helpful reply:

“Dear Harvard student.  How rude to be asked what race you are. It reminds me of the time I was hunted down by Muslim Seleka Rebels, dragged into the jungle and raped for hours before being set on fire.  Even though I know how difficult it is there, I too sometimes dream of going to Harvard.”

Well, thanks to Lisa for that sympathetic reply.  Here’s one more true life atrocity from an American female pre-med student.  [quote]  “My MCAT instructor keeps referring to the unnamed writers of certain passages with male pronouns. It made me feel stupid and unvalued...”

Our correspondent Fairly in Afghanistan responds...  “Dear American pre-med student.  How terrible to have to overcome such difficulty as male pronouns in getting to go to school.  I too have suffered difficulties getting to school when men rode by on motorbikes and threw acid in my face.  Of course this is nothing compared to male pronouns, but I do sort of miss my face sometimes. I used to be very pretty.”

Well, I hope this advice has been helpful to all those American college students suffering from microaggression.  We here at the Revolting Truth understand that this sort of savage oppression can really harsh your buzz, especially if you already have a hangover and crabs.

I’m Andrew Klavan with the Revolting Truth.

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